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Recovery from Codependency is deep work based on shifting our relationship with ourselves. We may have to let go If the people in our lives are unwilling to work through their issues. "Firing" the people we were codependent with may be a part of that, but remember - codependency is about us, not them! Recovery from codependency involves learning to take responsibility for our own actions, feelings behavior, issues and lives. Codependents have as much difficulty accepting their powerlessness over people and events as alcoholics / addicts have regarding their powerlessness over their drug of choice. (Many treatment modalities approach codependency as an addiction to control and / or caretaking.) Ongoing therapy and a twelve step program (CODA meetings) are highly advised. Melody Beattie's is recommended reading, as is her book . Letting go of the need to control people, places and events is difficult, but will ultimately set us free of our self-defeating patterns, shame and fear. The investment in caretaking / control take a lot of our energy - letting that go frees our energy for more productive uses. |
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Note on Authorship: this website was created by a recovering addict and survivor; I am not a chemical dependency therapist or mental health professional. Except as otherwise cited, opinions offered here are the result of my own life experience and a great deal of reading in the Recovery and Mental Health fields. You may cite this site for academic reference, however in keeping with twelve step traditions regarding anonymity I request you identify the author as "Will H. - RecoveryMan.com Webmaster"
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